a wonderful song in a terrible week

That look you give that guy by EELS

never tought that I could be so bold,
to even say these toughts aloud.
I see you with him, and your eyes just shine,
while he stands tall and walking proud.

That look you give that guy, I wanna see
Looking right at me.
If I could be that guy, instead of me
I'd never let you down.

It always seems like you're going somewhere,
better than you've been before.
When I go to sleep, and I dream all night,
of you knocking on my door.

That look you give that guy, I wanna see
Looking right at me.
If I could be that guy, instead of me
I'd be all I can be. I'd be all I can be.


I'm nothing like what I'd like to be
I'm nothing much, I know it's true.
I'd like to stand in a better view
And my chances are so few

That look you give that guy, I wanna see
Looking right at me.
If I could be that guy, instead of me
I'd give you all I got.

I never tought that I could be so bold,
to even say these toughts aloud.
But if let's say, it won't work out.
You know where I can be found.

That look you give that guy, I wanna see
Looking right at me.
If I could be that guy, instead of me
I'd never let you down. I'd never let you down.

(Credit to SenzaQuite-youtube)

A story which we all know the beginning and the end, but will never know what happens in the middle

She was a rather beautiful girl, with nice eyes and lovely long hair whose always proud that she never got her heart taken by any guys. She never did fall in love, maybe because she used to get compliments from the opposite sex so much, that she looks like an angel, that she is the prettiest girl ever, that she smells so nice, and because of that she never trust any lines that were thrown to her. All men lies, that what she thought.

Until that day,when she was in Form 6, oh she never quite figured it out, was it the most amazing day or the most dreadful day since she first saw this world?That day as she walked to her class, a guy walk in front of her, and suddenly the guy turns around, their eyes met, and as cliche as it sounds, the world stopped spinning. She felt something, which she was unsure of, and become more unsure when the guy turned his head around again to see her, two time. So that total 3 times, phew, in a way, she take it as a compliment, a covert one, and, a sincere one. Even in a corner of her heart there was a slight doubt, maybe he turn around because he saw someone else? there's something on her face? she looks like an alien? But she would like to think that he thought she was beautiful, and that's why he turned around for the sake of romanticism. And because of that stupid reason, she fell in love for the first time.

But
She never knew him, she didn't knew people in that school that well since she's newcomer, and to make matter worse, she went out of school the next week, because she already got an offer to university. So she left, never have the chance to get to know her first love. But she was a rather loyal girl, she spends her lifetime shutting down her heart for other men, and waiting for the day that she will meet the guy again.

Then years past,
and they met again, against all odds,
this time on a street, on a place she never thought she would find him,
she saw him there, she went numb, he didn't see her, she just stood there watching him, among the crowds. Watching the guy she helplessly loved for all these years. So she walked, in a small pace, slowly, her heart race, gluing her eyes on him. But then she stops, as she saw a little boy coming to him, and said the word that crushes her heart, "Papa" he said. So she stopped, silence, and then turn around to other direction. What a shame, a century wasted of loving Mr John Doe. Sad ending. The end.

yet another road to self-destruction

I always say yes to people

but

People always say no to me

how pathetic I am

You Sold your Soul to Magic Beans

When people heard that I studied in boarding school, some of them asked me what did I learn in my school. Well, I've learn a lot of things in school, and one of them is how to give excuse.

Why?

Well, it seems that every time we misbehave in school, the teacher always demand explanation from us. Why did we skip class? Why did we hit our friend? Why did we wear that shoes? Some of them even go as far as demanding 10 explanations for 1 misdeed since they know how much we hate excuse. I think most of students in my school hate excuse, I don't know why, but we rather being punished (rotan, pumping, lari 80 round) than giving excuse when we misbehave. Maybe because there was no excuse, we misbehave just because we want to. But our teacher seem to stick by the principle "everything has its reason", maybe because we are a science school??

Anyway, I don't really remember the ridiculous excuses that I had given, since there are too many. But I do remember one time when my teacher caught me and Utie went back to our room early and skip class. When she demand our excuse we said
"Cikgu, sorry, jam saya mati, tadi saya tengok sudah 1.30, jadi saya balik la dorm, rupanya baru 10.30. hehe"

Silly kan, jam mati, and the time move forward pulak, sepatutnya kalau jam mati the time should be backward la, like 8.30 ke.Anyway I think our excuse is quite reasonable compare to one guy in our school. When our warden caught him sleeping in his room during prep hour, he said this

" Sorry Cikgu, saya tidak larat pergi prep, JERAWAT saya pecah"
... and that wins the WORST EXCUSE ever in the world.

p/s: Teacher,please don't teach your student to give excuse, teach them to admit their mistake responsibly instead.

Do me a favour and stop flattering yourself

Seriously, I'm so jealous with poetic people, I wish I had the words to describe my feeling and thought like they do, but just like Adrian Mole, I can be only a poetic works lover, I'm just not a poet. Speaking of Adrian Mole, I can't wait for the new book to be released!! I'm obsessed! Yes!



p/s: I hope Adrian is already a grandpa in this one. that would be interesting.

don't! Opera, and yukky popia

Hey y'all!!

I've seen many of my friends add our lecturer as their friends on facebook, but I won't, and here's why- click here.

Anyway, someone from the opposite block has been singing opera since past month. It's very loud that I can here it from my room. It's not that I hate it, I just want to know who it is because I like to sing opera too!! When I am stress I would sing opera and it would make me feel relief (I'm serious!). Weird? I am weird, maybe you should try it too.

Then, last night I ate these yukky popia from bazaar ramadhan seksyen 17. Yukky! tak sedap langsung and the taste still stuck in my throat. urgh! Bazaar Ramadhan here memang yukky. I wonder why people berpusu pusu come here! I think some of the hawker just sell their food leftover, maybe they have many leftover, then they just said " Abang banyak nye lebih, ape kate kite jual kat bazaar kat seksyen 17,". I know it!!

Okay that's all. Happy fasting y'all!!

pantun dua rangkap

Oh it feels like the obituary of heart,
Now that I have lost my spell on you.